For Better or For Worse - New Trends for the First Dance

There comes that magical moment at every weddingtoday's brides and grooms are making less traditional
reception where all else stops, and all eyes gazewedding choices, why should their first dance remain
toward the center of the dance floor. It is emptytraditional? Isn't the wedding day all about the couple
except for the bride and groom as they prepare forand what they want anyway?
their first dance as husband and wife.Sure, a wedding ceremony and reception is about the
The first dance is an age-old tradition - originatingcouple, there's no denying that. After all, they, and
with formal balls in Europe where the person with thethe celebration of their new life together, are the
highest social position, often the Emperor or King,reason for the day's events and the gathering of
would have the first dance, thereby signaling thefriends and family. On this day, all eyes are going to
official start of the event. For events of lesserbe on the bride and groom anyway, regardless of
nobility, the host and/or hostess would have the firstwhat they are doing, or how they are doing it. So
dance.the bride and groom need to carefully think about
Formal balls have become a thing of the past. Gonewhat these eyes are going to see. They are the
are the once common knowledge and skills ofhost and hostess, and as such, should put careful
ballroom dancing, but luckily not completely forgottenthought into what they are providing for their guests.
thanks to dance studios and instructors. ManyLike the hundreds of thousands of other wedding
couples, in the desire to avoid showing their friendsguests across the country, their guests will witness
and family that they each have two left feet andmany "traditional" formalities, including the cake
possess a distinct lack of rhythm, have opted for atcutting, tossing the bouquet and garter, and the
least a few dance lessons so they can gracefully twirlcouples' first dance. However, these traditions were
around the dance floor with a more polished look onfirst implemented centuries ago, and their meanings
their wedding day. And if they prefer to practiceand symbolisms have changed significantly through
solely in the privacy of their own homes, dancethe years. Today's bride and groom have to decide
instruction videos and DVD's are available.what meanings, if any, these formalities hold for
However, a new first dance practice is suddenlythem. What do they hope to achieve as they plan on
emerging. No longer are couples simply doing aparticipating in these formalities? Is it to follow
foxtrot, waltz, or that old stand-by, the old "hightradition, to become the center of attention, or
school sway." In its place is a professionallysomething else entirely?
choreographed routine rivaling something you'd seeWould they be more comfortable with something
on a theatre stage during a musical. This trend issweet and traditional, or is something dramatic and
becoming more common, as couples across theentertainment-like more suitable? Again, there is no
country reenact scenes from "Dirty Dancing," Michaeldefinitive answer. Like any other planning decision, it
Jackson's "Thriller," and the opening sequence to "Thereally depends on the style and formality of event
Spy Who Loved Me," complete with pantomimedthe couple wishes to have. As the first dance has
gestures along with the carefully practiced dancethe power to set the tone for the event, making an
moves. Some couples have even gone so far asappropriate choice is very important. Do they want
requiring their entire bridal party to take severalclassic and formal? Then holding to the traditional
dance lessons, and wear silly costumes. The trend inways may be best for them. On the other hand, if
elaborately choreographed first dances is getting sothey want something more modern and
popular that some of these routines are frequentlycontemporary, than why not an energized,
viewed on YouTube, and even show up on thechoreographed routine?
national news.However, like many things in life, the "what" isn't as
So, why is the simple first dance of old heading in thisimportant as the "why." What are they doing?
theatrical, dramatic direction? Why are more andDancing - following either tradition or the current
more couples trying to put on a show? A definitivetrend. But why are they doing it? Is it to signal the
answer is hard to come by, as there are manydancing portion of the event, to set the mood for
different hypotheses. Many claim that it is the faultthe rest of the evening, or to get their guests more
of an "all about me" society. That many couplesinvolved? Or is it an attempt to show off and say,
desire to "one up" other couples, so they choose to"Hey, look at us, aren't we great?" Just remember,
be as elaborate and showy as possible, so theythere won't be any Tony awards given out at the
become the focus of everyone's attention. Someend of the evening for best performance, and
think that the media is to blame. With so many talentSunday's paper won't be listing any reviews.
style programs on these days - 'America's GotHowever, what does come away from the event,
Talent,' 'American Idol' and 'Dancing with the Stars' -and in big part the first dance, are the memories to
perhaps they just want to get into the act. Anotherbe enjoyed for years to come. What do you think
thought is that this trend stems from the fact thatmost guests would want to remember - a couple of
we currently live in a culture that is just lessshow offs or a fun, enjoyable event?
traditional than ever before, including weddings. Since